Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Why we'll win....

After my rant last night about the ticket process, I have now settled down a bit and am getting excited for the series to start. We all need to do this. The thing with the tickets sucked, but now we're over it. Let's remember that we are now in the World Series and get behind our boys. So, with pretty much the entire world picking the Red Sox in the series, here are some reasons why the Rox will win:

- We won the season series.

I know, I know. The World Series is a different beast. We have to face Josh Beckett at least twice. The Red Sox are more amazing than the invention of beer, the destruction of the Nazi's, and Jenna Jameson combined. Whatever. We still won the series during the season. Scoreboard Sox fans. We also shelled Beckett for his first loss of the year. The bottom line is that we won the series 2-1, in Boston, with the last two games won by a combined score of 19-3. I don't think we'll be intimidated by them.

- No DH in Colorado.

During games in Colorado, Red Sox pitchers will have to hit. Something they don't regularly do. But the more important issue is that the Red Sox DH, Big Papi, won't be able to hit unless he plays in the field. This means they will most likely move him to first base, which means the Sox will have to bench Kevin Youkilils. All he's done is hit .425 in the playoffs with 4 bombs and 9 RBI. Or they could move him to another position, which means they have to bench someone else, or move them to another position. Any way you look at it the Red Sox will have to completely change their defensive lineup when they come to Colorado.

- No Tim Wakefield.

I know he's not the top guy in their rotation, but he was the only pitcher the Rox had trouble with in the series in Boston. In the NL West the Rox have seen plenty of great pitching. Most have been in the form of big, tall, intimidating fellas who throw nasty stuff. We've faced guys like Brandon Webb, Jake Peavy, Chris Young, Brad Penny... even David Wells and Greg Maddux. We know how to hit the big guys who throw hard. What we don't know how to do is hit the knuckle ball. Luckily, now we don't have to worry about it.

- Because Red Sox fans need something new to bitch about.

Ever since the Red Sox won the Series in '04 they have lost their identity. They used to be the loveable losers, the team that just couldn't catch a break. They would always come close and then some sort of great injustice, some rare sporting catastrophe that has never happened to another team before (like a ground ball going between a guys legs to tie the score, they still could have won that game later) would happen to them and they would fall short. Now that they've won one, they are just a bunch of self entitled douchebags. Seriously, how many DVD's, ESPN columns, books, magazine covers, etc. do you need to celebrate one win? Someone wins the Series every single season. Other teams have waited longer for a Series win. But somehow their wait was longer, their win sweeter, blah blah blah. No one outside of New England cared.

But now you're the Yankees. You're the team that tries to buy a championship every year. You're the favorite every year. You're the fans that everyone else in the country hates. And it bugs the shit out of you. You long to be the loveable losers again. So you need this Series loss. You need it to happen in some strange way so you can start the string of compaints again. "The Rockies shouldn't be in the playoffs", you'll say, "Holliday didn't even touch home plate!". If the Padres hadn't choked to end the season we wouldn't have had to play the Rockies! Plus they got eight days of rest before the series!" You'll complaign. And secretly, down somewhere deep inside you yourself, you'll be happy again. Happily miserable.

So here's one fella who's picking the Rockies to win. Besides, they've won 21 out of 22. If this were any other team would anyone pick against them? But since we're just the Rockies the streak can't continue against the mighty Red Sox. Can it?

Why not?