Nuggets vs. Spurs Season Finale Preview. The Game No One Wants To Play

In an odd twist of fate, the Nuggets will play the Spurs Wednesday night in the last game of the season. Of course, we now know that the Nuggets and Spurs will be playing each other in the first round of the playoffs as well, so Wednesdays match-up could be a preview of what lies ahead in the series. The only problem is that neither team has anything to play for, and since they are starting the playoffs in a few days, it is highly unlikely that any of the regular rotation will see much court time. So with that knowledge in tow, I thought I'd breakdown Wednesday's game position by position before taking a look at the playoff series later in the week. So here's a look at the probable starting lineups: PG - Nuggets - Anthony Carter Spurs - Beno Udrih Carter was signed by the Nuggets earlier in the week. He is a 7 year vet who's played for four different teams. He was a contributor for the Heat for a few years and has managed a lifetime 3 point percentage of 12.8%. Not exactly a threat from behind the arc. But he was a favorite of Dickie V. back at the University of Hawaii, so he's got that going for him. Udrih is a third year pro from Slovenia who has consistently become a worse basketball player every year he's been in the league. Every single stat he has (outside of FT %) has decreased each year. The once promising lefty has begun losing playing time to old timer and Kansas scum Jacque Vaughn. Advantage - Spurs SG - Nuggets - Yakhouba Diawara Spurs - Brent Barry Diawara is better known as the only "defensive stopper" in the league who can't actually stop his opponent from scoring. They say Diawara is raw, I say he's terrible. For some reason Coach Karl likes him though and he continues to see the floor despite the fact that he is a shooting guard who can't shoot or gaurd anyone. He also has a lifetime spot on any of my future Deadly Hippos All Ugly NBA Teams. It's almost impossible to believe that Brent Barry won a dunk contest at one point in his life. In fact, if you told someone under the age of 14 that Barry was a dunk contest champ, they would probably slap you in the face, kick you in the balls, then tell their parents that some creepy older guy was telling them lies. (what's the most random part of that dunk contest by the way? That Barry won it, that Finley finished second, or that Darrell Armstrong was in a dunk contest?)That said, Barry most likely won't see the court for too long and will be replaced by James White, the rookie from Cincinnati who will win next years dunk contest. Advantage - Spurs SF - Nuggets - Linus Kleiza Spurs - Matt Bonner Kleiza has actually come on fairly strong in the past 6 weeks for the Nuggets. He needs to be constantly reminded that he's not Sam Perkins every once in awhile, but still he has been playing well lately. So well in fact, that it's likely he'll play a limited role leaving room for Dermarr Johnson to get some PT. Dermarr is one of those guys who should be really good but just isn't. In that regard he is the Scott Caan of professional basketball. Bonner is kind of like a poor man's Brian Scalabrine. Which means it should be incredibly exciting to watch him play. He's actually not a bad player, he's a very good shooter who puts up good numbers when he gets enough minutes. Plus his Ginger Meter is off the charts. Advantage - Nuggets PF - Nuggets - Reggie Evans Spurs - Fabricio Oberto Evans is probably best known for his nut-grabbing incident involving the Kamonator in last years playoffs. I bet you didn't know that he leads the league in rebounds per 48 minutes though. A fact that makes John Hollinger nearly blackout in orgasmic glee. Oberto is another one of those South American power forwards that hustles, sets great picks, gets junk points, draws offensive fouls, and generally makes announcers jerk each other off in appreciation. He's kind of like Anderson Varejoa with greasy ass hair. Advantage - Nuggets C - Nuggets - Jamal Sampson Spurs - Francisco Elson Here are some facts about Sampson that you probably don't know: 1) This is his fifth year and fifth team in the NBA. 2) He played for Cal in college where he averaged 6.4 ppg in his lone season. 3.) He has shot 14-20 from the floor in his last two seasons. 4) When I was out at the Purple Martini with a college teammate Jamahl Mosley (who's now an assistant coach with the Nuggs) more people recognized him than Sampson, and finally 5.) He makes roughly ten times the amount of money that you make. Francisco is an ex-Nugget who also went to Cal. Francisco has proven to be a serviceable backup center in the NBA. He is also a black guy from the Netherlands who is named Francisco. There ain't many of them out there. Advantage - Spurs So with the 3-2 match-up advantage, it looks like the Spurs have the upper hand in the season finale between these two teams benches. Either way I am glad that I didn't pay any money to watch this game. Check back later in the week when I'll have a breakdown of the real players for the upcoming series.